there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
if you google earth my address you can see me getting out of my car. finally my moment of being famous
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
My puffy vagina and I are on the way to the doctor to see what your mutant penis did to us THANKS A LOT
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I want to show up to tomorrow's study group looking like I got hit by a train. A train made of dicks.
I just screamed IM THE CHUPACABRA and jumped on his dick. I need to evaluate my life choices.
I mean like, I missed 30 minutes of star wars to fuck you on Christmas so you must be worth something
Hey. You dropped and smashed your road beer in my store last night. Again. And this time you didn't even order anything. You just walked in, yelled "SWEDISH STYLE!" Then lost your beer, looked depressed, and left.
So I'm never gonna get to see you again?
Hopefully.
I'm just really glad SD weather is so erratic so I can get away with wearing a scarf in May to cover up these hickeys.
Randomize
