# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
Dude, I'm in her bathroom and there's crab shampoo... is it worth the risk?
You're missing what this discovery implies... she's got a fucking bush.
I wish there were wingman of the year awards.
Coming down off exstacy at a church event. Resisting the urge to dance to the church hymns.
she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
she sucked my dick to get the taste of the last guy's out. I need to find a new friend with benefits.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Hey guys.. So I accidentally broke the front door last night
Where are you? Where am I? Why am I so red?
He brought me a bottle of Jack, got me off 3 times, & then left. This is the best fakelationship ever!
If you really hate him do what I do: give him an amazing night of unforgettable sex then dump him. You’ll ruin sex for him because new girls won’t compare
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