ugh. people who use coupons make me wanna punch a baby.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
I'm tired and starving, and I'm pretty sure I just cost the company 33,000 dollars...fuck you and you're "you'll love going to work high" nonsense.
I've fallen from my one moral pedestal
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
I wanted sex but got Ace Ventura: Pet Detective, instead. Then I had to drive 30 minutes home wet. Worst booty call, ever.
Sorry for face planting onto the table with all our alcohol on it
At this point all my Tinder matches are telling me I'll be fucking the whole male population of UMass '17.
Randomize
