he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
finally achieved: got laid in the religion section of borders. thought you should know.
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
I had my first sober conversation with his roommate. I remembered half way through that the first time we met I was getting fucked on his counter
How many times do I have to drunk reject you for our friendship to become awkward? Cause were at 9 as of last night
I just bared my soul to you and you fell asleep. Or you're fucking your boyfriend. Either way, not cool. fuck.
I'm going to try to be reasonable tonight and keep my drink count out of double digits
I think we should go through the tsa checkpoint with raging hardons when we go through LAX. I think we should pass out some viagra to everyone
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
he's such a nice guy...he deserves a bigger dick.
Shotgunning beers in the shower. Mom would be proud.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
