I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
There are drunk kids outside our building hugging that cop that's always on his bike as he's citing them for public drunkenness. It's not even 11 am.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Are you doing that thing where you're convinced I made a terrible decision
Daily.
She's the perfect storm of great hair, big boobs, intellectualism, and mild moral ambiguity.
This wouldn't be the first time my boss has seen me topless
I just found a piece of dried shredded carrot on my bed
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
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