Will you blow on my dice?
Barsexuality is the new black.
i hit her car. ill just send her a farmville gift in the morning. then it'll be alright.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
I tried. Now my legs are bleeding and I cracked my head on the coffee table. Never taking your advice again.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
This santa hat i wore to the bar, served it's dual purpose as a vomit bag.
Id have to say flaming beer pong was a royal success.
I asked her politely not to touch my dick
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
The best part of the night was you shouting "I have to take the LSAT tomorrow" between shots of fireball.
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
Randomize