I'm fucking your sister right now.
You motherfucker
She's next.
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
He's throwing up in my bed and I'm not even getting fucked for this
I can't wait to be a mother. My daughters gonna outdrink every boy in her grade
Word is he has some crazy hawaiian STD
I got mine. It's a truly beautiful penis. Plus he pulled his tongue muscle on my vagina.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
They're magnificent. It's like god made her last but hadn't fulfilled his boob quota.
A penis isn't a time share. I want to own not rent.
Omg I literally just wanna sleep with you right now. Like actual sleep. Not sex. Well maybe. But sleep first
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
Just watched someone fail a field sobriety test. Miserably. At 4:50p. I think it's my future husband
God bless him
Randomize
