so remember that time i slept over and came home in the morning to realize i left my vibrator next to the faucet for parents and brothers to see? this is worse
the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
He is like that thing on the menu you would eat because nothing else looks remotely edible.
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
my co-worker, his best friend who also works with us, an my baby daddy, ive turned love triangle into a retarded shape with to many sides to pronounce
We need to buy some popsicles so we can remind ourselves we're good at this.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
It was a sobriety test blowjob. If he could get it up, he could get me home.
found a hand written recpiet for 'one doe fawn' on an open crate in my living room need help to find it
where the hell would u of bought a deer
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
a kid puked on the floor and instead of, you know, cleaning it they cut a square out of the carpet with a boxcutter and threw it outside
i had a long naked conversation with the cop on why is everything fun illegal
I don't know man, I have to ask my girlfriend if I can borrow my balls from her purse.
Randomize
