Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I will be home in 10 min. Dont be beating off on the couch
enter at your own risk
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
You're having sex and i just smoked and made oatmeal...i'll give you some time to be jealous
If you dedicate your next bite to me, I'll dedicate my first orgasm to you.
she gave me a handjob in the middle of the night and my stomach growled so she walked out totally naked and came back 5 minutes later with two sandwiches. who the fuck says getting married is awful?
For some reason 'start yourself on fire drunk' isn't nearly as funny after last 4th of july..
I full on slapped a girl with pizza. Like in the face with sauce splattered everywhere and grease with a hard slap to the face.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Competitive oral. I'm always telling girls they are only the fourth, maybe third, best blowjob I've had. They go back down with something to prove.
I accidentally stubbed my dick
What does that even mean?
Randomize
