Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I found it funny that her boobs actually kinda felt like a bag of sand. the 40 year old virgin should feel better about himself.
I found the perfect eye liner, it passed the blow job test, no smudging!!
Less talking, more tequila
It's probably not healthy how legit bummed I am that my bottled of wine is gone.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
You let someone poor beer into my mouth off of a balcony. Best friend test failed.
Haahahahahahhaaa
I've officially dedicated my newly single life to making myself squirt.
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
I'm actually pretty sure the amount of alcohol I drank last night erased memories from other times in my life.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
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