yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
Whiskey shot with bacon bits, our version of Goldschlager WE ARE TRYIN IT.
Strip beer pong in the front yard? Of course the cops showed up
Did I send you an asleep facebook message about the upcoming football season titled 'BRILLIANT' at 4:45 this morning?
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I think it would be reallllly cool if you took your best friend to work so she doesnt have to have an awkward cab ride with the driver she drunkenly made out with last night ...
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
Your life is one shit show away from being a lifetime movie.
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
Not saying I'm a lesbian. Just saying that every time she walks by I wanna scissor her
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
