am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
so i told her that taking semen on the face helps make your skin smoother.
and?
luckily she was drunk enough to believe she had really bad acne...
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
I passed out on the floor of a truck stop. Drinking binge 2011 is now over.
There's a fried egg and an empty bottle of reddiwhip in the parking lot. Did you have fun last night?
I wiped my mouth this morning with a pine tree branch after I threw up on the side of the road. Tis the season
That amazing moment when the girl in the passenger seat decides to strip you while your driving.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Just hooked up my fuck buddy with a job working for my dad...this can only end bad.
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
I'm officially removing you from my nudes recipient list on snapchat.
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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