No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
We told the pizza man that the door was most likely unlocked, he could leave the pizza on the counter and give himself 20%. He did it-I'm never moving out of Aspen.
I can blatently call girls sluts here and they think i'm speaking norwegian
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
I just realized that two weekends in a row we ended up in a bathroom with two different boys asking us for a threesome. does this happen to everyone?
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
Jerry got outside again, i found him making dirt angels in the garden. I need to put a bell on that bastard.
I have the starring role in a literal shit show.
I'm not sure how long my penis is exactly, but I will tell you it resembles a bendy straw
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
One lesson I've learned so far from college: You've always got time for one more shot. Always
Randomize
