was i over the top when i said that i wished they made v-neck pants to her?
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
I don't know what your problem is but seriously you're a cunt for throwing up that song on your page. It's rude as fuck
omg its myspace i didnt think anyone took that seriously anymore
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
Oh you don't have to buy a shower curtain, I stole the one from her bathroom. It has dolphins on it.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
I'M MAKING HIKING PLANS WITH THE GIRL WHO IS DATING MY EX, THAT IS PERSONAL FUCKING GROWTH
Dear God, please let me get my period. And if this one is fiercer than usual I completely understand.
I'm too depressed to masturbate. This election is the worst.
he's so hot I'd consider breaking the whole, "till death do us part," agreement he's currently in
Met this british guy. Played pool. Broke into an apartment and had sex
Randomize
