Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
Nothings more american than taking a shit with a handgun next to you.
I'm trapped in whichever ring of hell is populated by inbred yokels and type 2 diabetes.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
Im down. Even tho your nick name intimidates my vagina.
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
Human Centipede: The Drinking Game. This is non-negotiable. First one to pass out the rest of us get to FEEEEED THEM!
I don't mean to ruin your favorite Disney movie...but...we both came when Mufasa died.
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
He handed me a temporary tattoo and said cover the hickey up with this
Ah well. Drinking wouldn't be drinking without mystery bruises
Agreed.
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
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