Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Theres this fat girl in desperate need of the proactive factory in my class and as i watch her shovel food in her face I am struggling to not only keep down my meager lunch but also to stay straight. Eliza Dushku couldnt even get my flacid dick to move
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
Can you explain to me the broken disco ball in my front yard?
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
I don't judge her for getting booty calls at 2 in the morning, so she can't judge me for staying in friday nights and putting spray cheese on pringles.
nothing can ever be as bad as the night i blacked out, updated my fb status to i need a pity fuck and then passed out for 13 hours.
You know I'm dangerous when I have make-out withdrawals
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
If by science you mean beer then YES!!!!
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