I play with my boobs when I'm bored. I playwith my nipples whe I'm drunk
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
FYI, if you pee in my bed (or even let R___ and E___ sleep in it), I will fart loudly during your wedding vows. Trust.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
He's like the houdini of condoms. I never even realized he put one on before we fucked. he's magical.
WHY DO I WANT TO FUCK EVERY GUY THAT BREATHES
Hooked up with an ex Playgirl model. I feel like the universe just high-fived me for staying sober.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
She's sent me the same nudes using the same gestures and positions... It's like she has a template for her sluty-ness
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Randomize
