You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
By the way the fattest man alive got married yesterday and I don't even have a boyfriend.
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
I googled "I hate my uterus" just to make sure I wasn't the only one.
she gave up head for lent, but she said sex was still fair game
Best friends brother. Beat that.
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
I can hear the condescending tone from the atm when it asks if $3 is all I would like to deposit
She literally crushed my balls between her butt cheeks. It was both the greatest and worst thing ever. Dancers are awesome.
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
thats all i want out of life, to get high and watch weiner dog races
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