There is so much to learn about oneself from autofill.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
i shit in a pringles can and hid it somewhere in your house....happy hunting
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I'm drunk, I'm covered in pizza, and I'm watching Jurassic Park. I feel like you'll get this. xx
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
I'm about to order this penis-casting kit so text me within 5 mins if you're not down
You smoked too much and passed out, didn't you?
You know me so well.
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
I’m looking forward to our Cougar years. These freshmen know how to fuck
Randomize
