I prefer the term 'tenderly watching'
such a stalker...
she wanted to love me. she just didn't know it yet.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Peed in a sink tonight. That drunk. I'm not proud of myself for what I did. But to carry it out with such class. I should be awarded
I remember halftime. Then I woke up in Spain. I need a drink in order to process this.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
She looked up at the menu and yelled this is my absolute favorite literacy
Well she described you as a "Sex-Viking", which seemed to be only slightly related to the red beard. So things are looking good!
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
We were kinda loud so his roommate woke up and to make up for it he invited him to a threesome. I can't drink whiskey anymore.
Honestly I was sitting in managerial accounting thinking "I really need to get my shit together and stop drinking so much wine." But when you asked I realized... it's wine. It's always a yes.
sooo the guy I beat last night in strip pong is the manager's husband at my new job...
He's only giving you free adderall so you can focus on his dick.
I offered to trade my cat for a bottle of tequila as long as it had a handle on it and realized I had a problem
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