So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
having to delete all your hookups stored in your phone as first name followed by frat/bar after they've graduated is such a bittersweet feeling
Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
I'd say the best part of the party was when you screamed to everyone that you were gettin dome on the reg
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
i ended up playing naked naked monopoly and hangman with my dealer. i really love my life.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
The fact that you're allowing Santa to dry hump your ass is sort of a dealbreaker
I kept resisting the urge to yell "2 for 2!" so they could hear me on the other side of the wall.
Red flag bro. Her only friends are barflys and a teen with a fake ID
i need to put some appletini on your dick
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
If you left your bike out in front, I just watched some dude steal it.
Randomize
