She wanted to fuck you. You threw up on her. Congrats.
i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
I think she just tried to waterboard me with her vagina.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH SOCIETY?!?!?!
... says the kid who took a shit in my parents dishwasher...
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
Tortellini makes me feel like I'm eating hundreds of little vaginas
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
If you say no to drinking on a Monday then I'm going to take you to the hospital for a MRI
Take a good hard look at your life. And the number of 18-20 year olds that you have made out with in the last 6 months... and then keep doing whatever the fuck you want.
Are you still feeling it? I'm in the bathtub. The water doesn't work but it's okay because I'm wearing pants.
You know what would make this walk of shame even better? Picking up my cap n gown on the way to my car
My life has evolved from screwing randos, ok?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Randomize
