they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
I don't know what you're doing, but there's a dragon on my street.
Some chick is drunk waving down a taxi with a slice of pizza.
At what point during this road trip should I let them know I've been drinking in the backseat the whole time and can't take my turn driving?
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
i'll llet you know if at any point this night starts to make any sense
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Correction: *I* watched JoJo's Bizarre adventure while he snored asleep on me cock still fully inside me.
Do you know why I slept in the yard last night?
You said you watched the lion king stoned and had to do it for simba.
Pride rock will get you every time.
If everyone felt the happiness from apple crown royal we would be in a better place
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Anyone who does not know who Paul McCartney is does NOT get to put hands in my pants
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