im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
Check that he is NOT ok. He just heated up SoCo and used it as syrup on his pancakes.
So I gave him a handjob and now we aren't friends anymore
You're at Notre Dame. What did you expect?
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
dude, apparently i tried to force feed my grandma bananas last night.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Thanksgiving day drinking ended up with me in a shopping cart screaming where are the bitches and condoms. I'd say it went well.
I don't have the resources to adequately explain this. I need like a Powerpoint presentation and also Vodka.
And on the way out from Applebee's he tried to take the basket of toothpicks claiming he was using them as a tax write off. Last time I babysit my dad on thirsty Thursday.
do nipples grow back?
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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