she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
well most of my day revolves around power hour
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I made her cum... she sounded like Ray Romano
You fell out of your barstool, I tried to help you but you said if I got any closer I'd be drinking my meals through a straw, So there you sat.
Apparently I told the girl smoking was terrible for her, and then requested it in my mouth.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
So I just stole my deans keys to break into the dining hall to get coco puffs. I shouldn't have gone to this meeting stoned.
For context, I was hiding under the pong table mooing at everyone by that point.
I lost my voice. So I'm going to pretend I'm Ariel with legs today.
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
She started crying because the Rugrats grew up
I’d say they were worth it. He screamed “your tits are fanfuckingtastic!”while he was cumming
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