Yeh xou jao i ama wa7tdud !!
Oh my god. its not even twelve thirty and you are useless.
Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
I'll go out only because I know the starving children in third-world countries would frown upon us if we let an hour of free sangria go to waste...
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
He didnt have condoms & didnt trust himself to pull out. Thats when I knew he was a keeper. So I blew him so he knew I was a keeper too.
True romance of the 21st century.
im afraid if i stop breathing i will turn into a porcupine
we drunkly made out in the middle of the street beside the homeless guy playing the flute. Not how I imagined our first kiss.
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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