ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Dude!! Mom just asked me why you have 'boobies' hahaha
I hate my life
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
she said they gang banged her to "who let the dogs out." the dude left of the middle barked along. sounds like a good time.
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
Were not alcoholics, were just impatient for fridays
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
He goes "hi, free today?" WHEN AM I EVER FREE ON A SATURDAY, I GOT HUNGOVER TO BE AND DRUNK TO GET.
I feel like I should be doing a victory lap around my house to the rocky music, or zapping and smiting people with my mystic wizard powers
And apparently i asked another younger guy at the bar if he wanted his bud light pumped straight into his vag. As i put back an irish car bomb...
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
You yelled at me about a fork.
You probably deserved it, I'm very territorial about my cutlery.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize
