i dont nkow, theres a guy slesping next to me and im wearing 8 tsthirts? wtf happened last night? will you come get me.
i think im in thre room next to you
woke up to an overdrawn credit card. did you order the dawsons creek boxset last night?
i hope so.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
Wouldn't it be fantastic if the corporate world cared less about about our GPA and focused more on our mastery of social drunkenness?
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
We did shots with the Tupperware consultant last night. I'd say the night was a success.
The George Foreman grill is melted. I don't know what other problems could arise.
He pulled out a coupon for $2.50 off the crab cakes and expected us to share that as a meal. Is that the kind of person you really see me dating?
I had to bail out of the tour de Franzia because I have class Saturday morning. Grad school is ruining my life
I've sent two unsolicited tit pictures in less than 24 hours. I'm the female version of a fuckboy.
I don't think Buddha would recommend a sexscpade across Mexico
Unless you want to see me masturbate, I think skype is a no go for now.
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
His wife found the thong I “forgot” in his glovebox
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