Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
you threw up out the window, wiped your face with a twenty dollar bill, and threw that out the window too.
did we at least go back and get it?
how else do you think we got jack in the box...?
just remind me when i get fired soon that august is the month i started pregaming work
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Bro if you were a bird I would puke in your mouth right now
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I miss forts and drugs that made me believe in unicorns...
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
I don't know how that blunt survived being in your pocket all night but you pulled it out at 4 am in 7/11 and tried to fire it up. Zero fucks given
I'm so horny right now but I JUST put my fuckin lasagna in the oven
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Listen gotta draw the line somewhere. Apparently that line is at my nuts.
man do I wish I knew who this naked guy in my room was...
Randomize