The guy I fucked in the port a poty just called me and asked me on a date!
Awkward!
No he was cute and I said yes!
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
im just going to wait until i dont feel like the grim reaper is having sex with me
You're a disgrace to the female race and the love triangle and halloween.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
ED guy's penis finally worked last night. It was a Festivus miracle!
ok first of all what the fuck
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
was having sex but got distracted... he instragramed a pic of his crotch
Randomize
