I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
He skyped me to learn how to roll a joint and for us to masturbate together. And you said a long distance relationship wouldn't work.
I'm a lady, I can't pee on the ceiling. Even I don't have that power.
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
I feel like his penis would have a weird haircut because he does.
And by defning the relationship I mean telling him I'm gonna fuck other people but its cool If he does the same.
Just sucked a bong hit straight from my girlfriends mouth & pretended I was a Dementor. Life just 87% more like HP.
Ok, it's starting to sound like someone's out there trying to learn to play the trombone while breaking kitchenware.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
I'm starting to think I didn't bring enough liquor for this family Christmas.
It's 2 pm....
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Head-banging is a very stupid way to injur yourself. But this opinion is also coming from somebody who can't walk right because they cut their asshole shaving last night, so it probably has little to no merit.
Send me a picture of our booze closet. I'm homesick.
I woke up and he already had a joint rolled waiting next to the bed. Love.
Randomize
