Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
I'm pretty sure the only race ive ever won was to my mothers egg
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
How does "I'm not drinking tonight" turn into body shots?
he found cum stains on my sheets and all i could blurt out was "better on the sheets than in me"
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
Cleaning my room at 2am, in just one corner I found six beers, half a pint of whiskey, my flask, 2 shotgun bullets, my crown and shimmer lotion.
I bought the restaurant a boat airhorn to wake up sleeping employees.
I love you
I don't want to be drunk any more. Can you hit the off switch?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Randomize
