I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
Your dick is once again the conversation topic.
He took a banana and in front of everyone showed her how he wanted it done.
I sat in the bathroom on the counter and gave out advice to all the random people that walked in
he needs a life. he was like frothing at the mouth to cockblock you
Dude, she's the greatest salesman alive. she convinced chelsea to buy a box of Cheerios for $20. She can find your dick some willing pussy.
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
We spent 45 minutes searching the crevices of our friend's car with a pair of tweezers trying to find the acid that we dropped
I gave him head during Pitch Perfect 2, I felt like the Bella's were cheering me on with their back up tunes
it was a hallmark card with butt plugs.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
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