What's the procedure for failed threesomes? Do I friend her on facebook this morning?
He actually believes he's not an alcoholic if he doesn't go to meetings.
I wish there was a classy way to show off your boobs.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
Her face just looks like a massive mistake. That's the only legitimate description I can say about it
just puked a little into my hand/sleeve. way too hungover for the first day of class
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
He said that I looked like a "ghost had crawled up into my vagina and died"..so yeah, I'd say the hangover was noticeable.
You told me that you were as fast as lightning and you wanted to race me. Then you faceplanted after falling down the stairs.
It's shark week go big or go home
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
So I was at my annual OBGYN appointment and when she saw the bruises on the inside of my thigh she asked if I had been horse back riding...I think my burst of laughter then awkward silence answered the question for me.
Randomize
