I was too high to figure out which of the three doors would lead me to my classroom, so i sat down in the middle of the hallway and ate a twinkie.
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
I had to put a towel over my laptop because the little power light was too bright. New hangover low.
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
Dad danced with a girl half his age and her boyfriend just sat at the bar and waited for dad to be done. I bought pity nachos.
Let's try finding a bar where there aren't people who want to hang me from a tree by my nutsack
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
I just showered and shaved both ankles and one knee because that's the skin that's exposed in the jeans I'm wearing today. Please tell me I'm not the only one who does that.
i think we sleep fucked last night...
Hey
Gfdhklhgfxzyuikl$
GODDAMNIT WHY AM I MISSING THIS
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
when some dude came up to you and said he didn't like your shirt you just looked at him and firmly asked if he really thought that you gave a fuck.
Randomize
