Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
You admitted to me in secrecy that you want to jerk off a unicorn.
sleeping like a two year old who chased ambien with a bottle of whiskey.
so my dad walked in on us having sex
lulz really? why?
lets just say he wont be answering to 'daddy' for a loooooong time
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
Well I could just do a roadtrip and hit them all. Slut tour 2012.
I am lonely and I want to touch your beard
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
To me, you're the Patron Saint of good music and handjobs
Turns out end of the world sex is H-O-T, HOoot! I'll be the only progressive lady smiling today
I'm watching Netflix with my cats and eating homemade bread. Everyone and everything can go and fuck itself.
Because you put the dick in ridiculously amazing boyfriend. And you deserve to have nice things happen to your penis. That's why.
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
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