You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
My poor mother should have just stuffed me back up her vagina when she had the chance.
A small cock is a small cock, don't blame the size of my hands
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
i know im back at school when i can poke any random spot on my body and expect a 80% chance that theres a bruise there
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
Remember Christopher who always sends me pictures of his penis? Look to your right, boy in the blue.
I want to die, ON THAT, with that INSIDE ME. ironically, I sense that would be the only time I'd feel alive.
THIS MOTHERFUCKING ROOSTER
IT KEEPS CHASING ME BACK IN THE HOUSE
FUCK THIS BIRD
Thanks for letting me cross "getting high at park with children" off my bucket list
You tried to pick a fight with a polka band saying that you'd wrap the accordion around their throats
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
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