goodnight i made you a song goodbye
How old was that tiny chick? she needs a lard iv.
It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I think he just gave me the 'I used to fuck your sister' discount
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
she found me naked passed out on the toilet and i just kept repeating "i'm like elvis, but not dead."
You totally drew a penis wizard on my closet that says "I travel for cock rock"
Did we fight the bathroom girl ? She just wanted to give us lotion and condoms.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
He sent me a slow motion video of him jerking off...it was so long (the video not his dick) even I felt awkward watching it alone
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Moms passed out wet and naked in a rocking chair again....
Randomize
