It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
Absence makes the cock grow harder.
He kept singing "who's that peekin in my window" we thought he was high til we realized someone was lookin in the windows.
the only compliment i could think of for this chick was that she looked 'moderately attractive'
So I just learned that my father was teaching me rules for drinking games when I was 5.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
I've come to realize sober is a rare time of the day.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
Penises. Everywhere.
You're. Welcome.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
Her car is covered in frozen vomit, and she lost her iPhone. I'm also pretty sure I smoked crack last night. Rest in peace 2014.
We were fucking in the bedroom then we heard Sports center on in the living room. He stopped midfuck when I started celebrating that my team won over his
Randomize
