just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
there was a 40 knocked over. chips and salsa all over the floor. and she was in her thong doing boot camp on demand in the middle of the room..
Drinking with a woman who gave an anti-drugs speech at my high school. Somehow, not surprised.
I'm going to see if it catches on fire again, then I'll make the decision.
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
my parents decided to start a new christmas tradition. we will now be drinking champagne while opening presents, and we each get our own bottle
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
I woke up in a poorly constructed blanket fort on a strange office floor covered in rug burns and champagne. How was your night?
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
I'm not gonna lie. I need sex like plants need water right now. I just need the dick.
Randomize
