Come to wood. Julia is putting pants on. We must stop her.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
I owe her a pancake or a second hand orgasm
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
The last thing I remember is pushing my way into the bathroom and dumping a 40 on him. We havent talked since.
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
My jeans are ripped and her glitter was all over me.. My walk of shame looked like I fucked a unicorn last night
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
He started tongueing his parfait and told "thats what I'd to your ass" in the middle of Starbucks. Of course i brought him home
Can we both just take a day off just to have sex? Is that acceptable as an adult?
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
Btw that $18 I gave you to run around outside naked came out of your wallet.
Randomize
