We agreed on being friends w/ benefits. Lets see if that really happens.
Ok, so that was not supposed to go to u, my bad. I feel horrible.
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
It felt like getting blasted with a supersoaker filled with vagina juice.
how does 'resolution to respect myself more' follow 'he fucks me really hard'?
woke up wearing a canadian flag with the starting forward of the hockey team. i feel oddly patriotic
its amazing there are so many photos of me and him separately, since most of that party time was spent sneaking away to fuck upstairs...
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
It's like they're playing jeopardy and the category is "things that make women dry."
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
You have more time for sex than anyone I know.
well I've taken an Uber to my weed dealers twice in the past 2 weeks so it's going well since I sold my car
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
Randomize
