i don't think my life will be extraordinarily more meaningful if i let him put his tongue in my butthole.
What's the point of being healthy if people still don't want to fuck you?
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
let's just skip the pleasantries and go back to my place for pizza and casual sex
I am on a roof. I'm not sure which one, or why, or how, but I am on a roof and you should come get me. I can see info classrooms!
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I will kill you in such a brutal way if you ever de-pants me again on the dance floor it will make the stock market ticker
I'm sure he'll make the rejection quick and completely justified.
I just want to be able to run around naked and eat grass with no judgments and have people feed me and expect me to sleep all the time.
We're getting paid a considerable amount of money to send each other pictures of our dicks...
Like who turns down taking a nap inside of someone in 2014.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
Randomize
