Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
Dude, we totally smoked up inside a church organ last night. Add this to the epic list.
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
He just texted me asking if I remember pinching his eyelid shut with my eyelash curler.
Fun fact of the day: Our cat does not like rum.
Today, my boyfriend informed me that I look like my dad when I orgasm
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
It blows my mind that pandora doesn't have an : I want to lay in bed in the dark and be sad and cold and eat frozen mangos and chipotle all day station
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
Just went to my first strip club and they had Fox News on. Conservative booty time.
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
I'm pretty sure I lit a prostitute's cigarette while sharing a pizza with a homeless guy last night
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Randomize
