he conducted the entire waffle house into singing the song Oklahoma. He was wasted.
working out is totally making me break out.. i'm doomed to forever be either a butterface or a butterbod. there is no way out.
I had one margarita and got the worst headache of my life... its like my liver has senior week ptsd
Is it bad when your hot neighbor is crying on her porch, and your 2nd thought is "maybe her boyfriend cheated on her and she'll want to fuck me for revenge sex?"
Perfectly normal.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
So basically he tried to get out of the car and crawl on the highway with the broken leg because he didn't want to go to the hospital. It was not a good time...then we got pizza though.
Happiness for him is a different happiness than you can supply cuz you have life standards, morals and goals that dont include the bar or beer everynight.
I traded the garbage men the rest of my handle for a ride home. Best. Walk. Of. Shame. Ever.
He took the Gold in Olympic clit licking last night. Canada should be proud.
Just pulled a muscle trying to take a naked pic. I think it's time to start working out again.
Just walk of shamed past a 5 year old on my way out of my booty call. He waved at me. Is this the single life I've been missing?
He played with my boobs the whole time we watched Scott Pilgrim and then started invited others to play with them too. It reminded me of how my mom gives out my french fries without asking.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
maybe you should have closed the porn before you gave the professor your computer to hook up to the projector?
Randomize