People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
if it were possible I'd exchange my vagina for a diff one on the black market.
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
I just added 'steal mom's xanax' to my to do list for when I go home for Easter.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
I'm considering telling her about my dream where I made a sex tape with her boyfriend. you know to test our friendship
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
I knew it would be a shit show so I just went ahead and took plan b before I even got there. How's that for responsible?
On our way there. Drinking my beer out of a coffee pot. Cuz it's my bday
I'm pretty sure you and I ate the entire Keebler elf weed workshop
I told him if he ever gets a "wink" text from me after 10:00pm to assume I really mean "we should be hooking up by 2:30am"
The guy in the room next to me just offered to hide the next dose of morphine he will get for his broken leg under his tongue and then swap it with me in exchange for a roll of the good toilet paper my parent brought for me last they visited. The psych ward is a lot more hardcore than I thought.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
