I fucked **** last night, don't tell mike
this is mike. we're done.
just come out here and I will go home with you...
Nights of college: 1. Virgins: 1. Yes.
He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
we tried to steer you away from them but you just kept yelling 'i need dick' and going back. sorry.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
How do I go about messaging a girl on a dating site whose little sister I've had a three some with...?
I think I need to expose myself to your dog so he knows that I am also a male.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
Welcome to the club of "Sick of cleaning up actual shit." We meet on the 3rd Sunday of each month. Bring your ceremonial viking helmet.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Randomize