he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
I just did the nutritional comparison between 2% milk and Bud Light Lime.. the beer had less calories, less carbs, and less fat. It's not looking good for milk in my life anymore
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
come parachute off the vicodin airplane with meee
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
I'm to the point that I've had the revelation that its physically impossible for my arms to be attached to my torso.
There are people taking shots out of a turtle shell.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Mom and I are both drunk and walking around the Strip. It's like the hangover but with a lot more bathroom breaks.
It's no shave November. This is our time.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
Starting to realize that fucking everyone I come across isn't the most... "adult"... coping method.
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Randomize
