so that wasnt chicken after all
So how was last night?
Let's just say I danced with the devil
Huh?
I'm going to Hell for sure
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Isn't that the only thing she's good at? Complaining and blow jobs?
Her directions to the house party: "the north star will guide you, turn left. I'm wearing the potato hat"
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Dont forget about the tuna sandwich behind your TV
I was just asked if I wanted to struggle snuggle. She's a keeper
When did angry sex become our thing?
She's legally too young to drink and was making out with a guy who is ethically too old to drink.
Someone put a huge skyy vodka bottle in our washing machine. My roommate didn't see it and ran it. The washing machine split in two. #life
It's okay to masturbate while watching the Comey testimony right?
Realization: many of my behaviors would lead to me being stoned to death in a lot of foreign countries. God bless America.
In the words of Disney’s Jafar, “desperate times call for desperate measures.”
Randomize
