Why dose there have to be another girl there for you to do this?
its hotter. Way hotter.
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
I ate one of your animal crackers. just one. ok four. but no frosting. ok frosting.
you dont publicly announce someones alcholism over facebook. you dont out someone like that.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
The mass text at 3:12AM offering "free scrotum tastings" will have repercussions
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
Do you remember some guy walking around the club saying "boner patrol" and smacking people in the dick?
Yeah, that was you
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
I never thought in a million years that I would have a threesome with my boss and his wife and yet here we are.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
Dude just saw some some guy puke out of a car window on the highway going to school.
Randomize
