drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
all he gave me for my birthday was sperm
at least its a homemade gift
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
Either seal the deal or get out of the room, I don't want to hide in this closet anymore
she has like 12 pairs of underwear people left at her house from the other night
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
At least is you came to Milwaukee to visit me you'd get the best mind blowing sex of your life and free wifi. Who doesn't want free wifi!
I could teach a class on "expressing your thanks through photos taken of yourself in the shower"
If waking up at 6 50 pm every day and getting invited to go have sex as you wake up is what alcoholism is like I can get use to this.
OMG -- There are strippers in the bathroom crying because their power moves aren't good enough to win the competition
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
I have no idea what happened last night, but my pee is neon green.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
Randomize
